Page 8

GAY PEOPLE'S CHRONICLE

December, 1991

THE MOSTLY UNFABULOUS Social Life ETHAN GREEN. O

THE

EDIBLE GIFT

OH BUCKY-

You've BROUGHT ANOTHER OF YOUR FESTIVve Holiday LOAVES! You SHOULDN'T HAVE..

Well, I KNOW HOW Much You Love

THEM. I MADE

THIS ONE WITH AN

entire BOTTLE OF MARACHINO CHERRIES...

THE ROMANS

BUILT AQUEDUCTS WITH BRICKS

LIKE THESE...

THE

POLITICALLY CORRECT GIFT. Now THERE'S

A PING PONG TABLE

IN A COMMUNITY CENTER

YOUR

STEP-AUNT'S GIFT

AUNTIE IRENE

You REALLY

ON AN INDIAN RESERVATION SHOULDN'T HAVE..

IN YUCCA-YUCCA COUNTY WYOMING THAT SAYS "GIFT OF ETHAN GREEN"..

WOW.CHARLOTTE..

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY..

YEA

I KNOW, BUT I WAS IN THE YOUNG ADULTS" SECTION AND I SAID TO MYSELF IRENE, THAT KEEP ON

THE

HOLIDAY GIFT EXTRAVAGANZA

HATSISTER GIFT

BEEFY SOPHOMORE

LOVE SLAVES

VIDEO

OMG. VALIUM

FOR THOSE FAMILY GETTOGETHERS...

You

THE

LOVER'S GIFT... ALRIGHT, MAYBE THERE

ARE PERFECT COUPLES SOMEWHERE ON THIS EARTH

WHO GIVE EACH OTHER EXACTLY WHAT THEY WANT WITHOUT ASKING... BUT NOT

MANY...

ITS A

RAPPIN' SWEATSHIRT IS

Guys

SOMETHING

ARE

MOVED

ETHAN'LL

THE

WELL IT

WAS THIS,

TRULY

JUST

BEST!

ADORE..

OR THIS

PTO

SKIN JACKET

GREAT SHARK

Stop NOW..

YOU'RE

NEON LAMP OF YOUR ASTROLOGICAL SIGN.

MAKING

Weepy

TOWELS

PING

THE

Flath

A DEPARTMENT STORE YOU THOUGHT WENT OUT OF BUSINESS IN THE MID TOS

ACE.

190 E. Ormer

Forty Whacks

by Lizzie Borden

Witch Hunting

Poor virgin Kim Bergalis. You know I feel bad the woman contracted AIDS from a professional with no brains. But let's face it, all this woman is doing is fighting for rights basically for the straight society, who she feels unjustly contracts this disease unbeknownst to them.

research, AIDS centers, and for more information so that dumb virgins who wouldn't even have sex, but contract it in other ways, are aware of this virus and what it does to people's lives.

And for those "other" people, let's see the gay community start benefitting from this bureacratic bullshit. Kim, if you want to stand up and be counted, fight AIDS, not individuals.

Whack, slice, chop, chop.

Well, Kim "I want to be a hero and be on all the talk shows" Bergalis, you didn't give a rat's ass about AIDS until you got it, and now that you do, you want to hang and mutiMagic Man late those that "gave" it. If you're going to spend all this time in government offices, why don't you get more money for AIDS

"Sweet

Earvin, Earvin, Earvin, how many times have I told you to stay away from that pretty

Arts"

Cakes & Sweets

Custom Cakes Candy Pastries

Please Call To Order

Committment Cakes

boy Isiah. You just have to be kissing him and touching him all the time. I realize the temptation with all those sweaty hard bodies all gleaming in the locker room, then getting them all clean.

Then using the Mrs. as a coverup. Well, you get credit from this old whacker for coming clean with your goodies. As a dear boy toy of mine said, you'll reach a community hard to touch, you'll speak to children who idealize you and your sneakers, and you'll hit the black community. That's a lot Earvin. You'll need to score a lot in this game and the rebounding is not so easy. You'll find there will be a lot of blocked shots by your opponents, but I'm hoping in the end you'll shine.

Beginning or ending, your choice Happy holidays, happy holidays May your little rears be swinging Happy holidays to you.

Well dears and queers, dykes and Mikes, it's holiday time again. This old battle ax wants to wish you the merriest, bareyest X-mas of all. Enjoy life, each other and keep it clean. Til next year, Happy holidays, happy holidays...

Join us for a "Gay-la Cruise" Several different itineraries and ships to choose.

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